Trump's Ménage à Tри

Untitled, Oil on Canvas, 44" x 52", Richard J Van Wagoner, Circa 2001, Courtesy Van Wagoner Family Trust**

That Fake Dossier

This time it wasn’t the Presidential Suite at the Moscow Ritz Carlton and the cameras were in plain view, but it did involve the talented Russian hookers Vlad and Terp, experienced sycophants in realizing substantial return for stroking an egomaniacal john in just the right spot. Awestruck by their portrayal of total dominance, authority and control, The Don readily gave it up, everything. “They love me! They love me!” The pillow talk? Only they know, though Lavrov did suggest a tryst in the toilet, tongue in (somebody’s) cheek I suspect.

To date only portions of the Dossier have been verified, but those verified portions represent considerably more of the potential whole than, say, Trump’s approval rating (36% and falling) and infinitely more than truth as a percentage of what he mutters (17% and waning). The veracity of the collusion part of the Dossier is coming into clearer focus, Jr.’s faux transparency notwithstanding.

As for video evidence of scatological proclivities that could prove useful when persuading The Don to put his own and the Kremlin’s interests above those of the United States, the effects clearly suggest the existence of a compelling cause. Maybe it’s just the money. (Trump Twitter Tracker)

Parenthetically, the Kremlin, in developing the goods detailed in the Dossier, largely over-estimated The Don’s resistance to placing his own interests above those of the United States. Why use blackmail when a few well-circulated, undoctored photos of his inauguration or his hands would have done the trick? Which part of this did we not see coming? And the Republican response?

“Better Red Than Dem” . . . RNC Platform

"The GOP’s determination to see no evil in Trump’s conduct foreshadows a horrifying future in which at least one party can team up with whomever they want, so long as the goal is to defeat a domestic political opponent."

Since Utah’s most embarrassing member of Congress resigned, Senator Hatch is jockeying for his old position:

"It's something that's way blown out of proportion," said Hatch, reacting to Trump's sharing highly classified information with Russian officials.

"I don't think this is relevant to the Trump administration," Hatch told reporters when asked about the meeting among Jr., Manafort, Kushner, and a bunch of Kremlin-connected Russians who had the goods on Hillary. Hatch defended Jr., assuring the matter was "overblown." “Donald Jr. is very dedicated to his father, but you know he’s not part of the administration [never mind that this was June 2016, seven months before a Trump administration existed].” "Look, I know Donald Jr., he’s a very bright young man, he’s a very nice young man. I think one of the things that endears the president to me is how nice his children are and they all love him. . . . He divorced their mothers and they loved him. And it’s pretty impressive to me how dedicated they are to their father."

A chip off the old block loves his dad. Persuasive. “We the jury find the defendant, Don Jr., not guilty.” Maybe I’ll give that one a go:

“Ladies and gentlemen: My client could not have committed the crimes of [fill in the blank]. Granted, he had motive and opportunity. He was present when [fill in the blank]. And they found him in possession of [fill in the blank]. He was spotted fleeing from [fill in the blank]. He had [fill in the blank] all over his hands and clothing. And his colleagues are under criminal indictment for their role in this unfortunate misunderstanding that should never have leaked. I will concede that the evidence, direct and circumstantial, is overwhelming. But the so-called victims have blown his conduct way out of proportion. They only have [fill in the blank] to lose. And why are we worrying about this sort of thing when we all could be thinking about and doing something else?”

“Look. I know my client. He’s a very bright young man. He’s a very nice young man.”

“We promised he’d take the witness stand and be fully transparent. He did and he was. Granted, he was evasive at first, but who can blame him? It’s hard being in the limelight, and what is “truth” anyway? But he got around to telling a form of it under what was really unfair cross-examination by the prosecutor. Putting words in his mouth like that? Shameful. By pointing out [fill in the blank] the prosecutor made it look way worse than it actually is. So what if it’s on paper in black and white. What good is a corroborated confession anyway?”

“Let me tell you about this young man. He can’t be guilty and here’s why. He is very nice. He loves his father, even though his father is kind of a scoundrel when it comes to women and wives and the mothers of his children, and though he tells the truth only 17% of the time. My client still loves his dad, who divorced his mother. The fact that those kids love their dad endears me to their father. It makes me really respect them and you should too. And his dad assured us — you heard him testify as a character witness — that his son is a wonderful, tremendous boy of 39 and most people in that circumstance would have done exactly the same things my client did out of loyalty to his father which means, hey, it couldn’t be all that bad if most people would do it for their dads. Right? You can take his father’s word for it.”

Sure hope I get Trump supporters on my next jury.

*My brother the fiction writer and novelist, Robert Hodgson Van Wagoner, deserves considerable credit for offering both substantive and technical suggestions to

**My daughter Angela Moore, a professional photographer, photographed more than 500 pieces of my father's work. On behalf of the Van Wagoner Family Trust, she is in the process of compiling a collection of his art work. The photographs of my father's art reproduced in are hers


Natural US Citizen. Caucasian. Shamed into blogging by DSM-V Cluster B 9/9-led regime, Utah's most embarrassing congressperson, and Newton's Third Law of Motion. The views expressed are mine.

USA, Utah, Salt Lake City


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